Stress - what can we do about it?

Traffic at night

We pretty much know what things cause, and indicate, stress. A traffic light turns green and somebody honks because the first vehicle did not immediately take off. I'm not proud to say I've been both those drivers. Maybe you have too.

How can we not be a victim of stress?

I've found that taking all my concerns to God as the one Mind helps a lot. It's good to sit back and have a conversation with this one good Mind. I tend to think of God as Father and Mother, so I might ask, "Father-Mother, here's this anxious thing going on in my life, and I don't know what to do about it. What do you say? What should I be doing here?"

And when I really want to hear what God is telling me, He/She does. It's mostly about learning to be a good listener. I've also learned that a good listener listens, he doesn't do most of the talking.

A dear friend was in the hospital recently, and I spent quite a bit of time with her concerned family, unti the crisis passed. It was a time for listening. Every report, good or bad, I took straight to God. Here are some assurances I heard, "I am the only Life, and my vital signs are very stable. Matter doesn't give life or take it away. I am the Life of all being. There is no other life."

I was comforted by these assurances and, while not voicing them, was able to comfort and support the family, until they were told by a caring medical staff that all was well.

It's easier to be patient and considerate behind the wheel too, when I remember that my purpose in driving is to help all God's children on that same road feel His love.

Patience most valued

Dealing with stress -- Excellent discussion. Allow yourself some time -- 45 minutes.
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Making a Difference - Cell Phones for Soldiers

Can you and I make a difference
in the lives of total strangers?

Two busy high school teens, brother and sister, from Norwell, MA decided they could make a difference. The same week a cousin deployed to Iraq, they saw a TV program highlighting another soldier’s plight -- trying to pay off $7,000 in phone calls to his family back in the states.

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“If you lend money only to those who can repay you,

what good is that?
Even the most wicked will lend to their own kind for full return!”
Do good wherever you have opportunity,

and don’t worry about repayment.
Then your reward from heaven will be very great.
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These kids launched a program “Cell Phones for Soldiers,” -- they collect old cell phones and sell them for recycling. With their first modest income, they purchased 60-minute phone cards, and sent them to overseas soldiers. Their project has grown to fully engage all their spare time, and their parents’ as well, with some 400,000 phone cards shipped over the past 3 years.

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“The rich in spirit help the poor in one grand brotherhood,

all having the same Principle, or Father;

and blessed is that man

who seeth his brother's need and supplieth it,

seeking his own in another's good.”

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Read their story.

Waiting for the harvest

In Jesus’ parable of the tares and the wheat, an enemy sneaks into a farmer’s wheat field and plants a look-alike crop, probably darnel, a sometimes noxious weed. Soon the foreman’s trained eye recognizes the weed and he wants to pull it out. But the farmer knows that process would damage the tender wheat. So he instructs his men to wait until the harvest when the difference between the mature plants will be obvious. "First, he says, gather the weeds and burn them. Then gather the wheat and store it safely in the barn."

My friend, Arthur, retired Illinois farmer and fellow healer, says that burning the weeds is important – that’s how you destroy the seeds so that the weeds cannot sow another crop. So the solution includes the future.

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“Nothing is lost that God gives: . . .

Leaving the seed of Truth to its own vitality,

it propagates: the tares cannot hinder it.”

(Mary Baker Eddy, Miscellaneous Writings 111:16)

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I think it’s significant that Jesus counseled patience. The Supreme Being has created man in His likeness, intelligent and unselfish, capable of accomplishing much good. When distractions and unproductive notions take root, that isn’t the end of the story.

If somebody you care about is making poor life decisions, and isn't hearing you, be patient. The destructive may look like it’s mingling with the good, but it cannot touch or harm what God has planted in His children. He continues to nourish His goodness in us until it inevitably matures. We can support the out-of-sight growing that's going on. Harvest time will uproot and destroy the weeds. And the good that has always been there remains intact.

Tares and Wheat Parable

Bloom where you're planted!

What a great concept! This easy-to-digest advice assumes a purpose for each of us. Wherever we are, we have an opportunity to discover that purpose. I believe our universal purpose is pretty simple – to help others feel God’s love. That’s something we can do anywhere.

How do we make those around us more aware of God’s love? My friend, Suzy, taught me one answer through the simplicity of her humanity. One hot Boston afternoon, we stopped in a busy Starbuck’s. She greeted the clerk with a smile and a, “Hi, how’s it going?” The clerk, surprised, smiled back and said, “Today’s OK.” Simple, friendly, caring, unintrusive, Suzy’s kindness bloomed right where she was at that moment. She saw an opportunity to brighten someone’s day a bit, and she did it.

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“Love, redolent* with unselfishness,
bathes all in beauty and light.”
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Cheering those we meet just happens to make us feel good too. Amazing how that works. A flower picked is gone. But joy shared multiplies. We just feel better about ourselves and the world if we have made someone else a little happier.

What if we are feeling too sad to even think about cheering someone else? Here is another amazing fact. Sharing God’s joy begins lifting us out of the sadness. The reason is because the source of the joy isn’t in us, rather it’s outside of ourselves. As we let that source of universal love and caring flow through us to others, it does not leave us unchanged. We’re cheered as well.

Blooming where we are, sharing some comfort or joy right where we happen to be, satisfies our heart's yearning for purpose.

*Note: The word “redolent” means fragrant! So, here's a question: are we more fragrant when we’re being genuinely unselfish?

Freedom to delete spam

The Dallas Morning News March 20, ran a Mary Jacobs column about email spam, and how recipients are often intimidated into forwarding silly, sappy, or insipid messages they would otherwise delete.

The intimidation comes from the last line of the email -- promising good luck if the email is, or threatening bad luck if the email isn’t, forwarded – to 5 people right away.

Unfortunately, email sometimes incudes junk. So like mail from the Post Office, email is about making choices. First choice: shall I read it-- is it from someone who sends reputable emails?

Second choice: is it worth sharing? That is, is the content awesomely beautiful, usefully amazing, delightfully funny, or constructively educational? If it doesn’t meet any of these minimum standards, the best thing is to not waste anymore time on it -- delete it. By deleting, we are refusing to be manipulated.

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Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble,

whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely,

whatever is admirable --

if anything is excellent or praiseworthy

-- think about such things.

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Our thinking is much like a mail box. Thoughts come to us in many forms -- good, bad, ugly. And we get to choose which thoughts to spend time with.

What helps me is to ask: What’s the source?

I've come to trust that when thoughts are good, unselfish, offer broad blessing -- they are most likely from God and worth listening to and praying about.

Thoughts that are critical, complaining, or anxious most likely are not from God and, well, they are the spam of the mental world.

It's wonderful to be able to give troublesome thoughts to God, find out His/Her view of what's bothersome, and stay with what this infinite Mind is knowing and doing, and to look for evidence of God's hand guiding throughout the day.

Whatever inspires and uplifts, offers constructive solutions, makes us feel good deep down inside, this is good stuff, and worth pondering.

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Look away from the body into Truth and Love,

the Principle of all happiness, harmony, and immortality.

Hold thought steadfastly to the enduring, the good, and the true,

and you will bring these into your experience

proportionably to their occupancy of your thoughts.
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What did Jesus do?

My friend Rose said she really needs Jesus as her Savior. She needs him to show the way. When she is fighting discouragement, she looks to Jesus for some ray of hope. When she is struggling to forgive, she needs Jesus’ example of unconditional forgiveness in order to get there herself. When she is battling human will, she needs Jesus’ humble, “Thy will be done,” to overcome that strong emotion. When she feels angry, she seeks Jesus’ spirit of calm dominion to help her put down such stormy thinking.

When we feel we cannot go any further, Christ reminds us, “Hey good buddy, you aren’t alone. Didn’t I promise to be with you always? I’m here for you. Lean on me.”

When wrestling with choices, Jesus’ humanity is my favorite option. He was always doing kind things for people; his biographies (the Gospels – Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) read like a list of kind reassurances and healings:

“Come unto me . . . and I will give you rest.”
“Fear not.”
“Be not afraid.”
“Your faith has saved you.”
“Your faith has made you whole.”
“Go in peace.”

Leaning on Christ, the Spirit of Jesus' life, we can join Rose in looking for solutions in how he lived -- what he said and did -- and go forward in his peace.

"Peace be still" story
Related post: Clutter in our lives. See March 20, 2007.

Today's good news!

Today's good news:

· The most important relationship there is, is our relationship to God, and that forever bond satisfies because He loves us wisely and generously. It is uninterrupted, constant, joyous, intelligent, fulfilling, comforting. And this security defines and uplifts all our other relationships.

· Divine Love in whom we live, knows no stress/strain/ tension/trauma. Divine Love causes us to be useful, whole, pure. This creative Love causes man to be spiritual, and to seek and relate to the spiritual nature of all things.

· What God gives us to do is comfortable, useful, beneficial, and never a burden.

· Christ constantly approves every good thought, word, and action, and affirms our ability and capability to live and move according to the laws of Life and Love – laws of universal progress

· Christ confirms our worth. You and I are indispensable to God, good. We are totally essential to the completeness of His universe. You are the evidence that God is Life, Truth, and Mind; that God is ever-present good.

Grabbing the initiative – do it first!

“The Golden Rule” is found in some form or other in most world religions:

• Buddhism: Treat not others in ways that you yourself find hurtful.
• Confucianism: One word sums up the basis of all good conduct… loving kindness. Do not do to others what you do not want done to yourself.
• Christianity: In everything do to others as you would have them do to you.
• Jainism: One should treat all creatures in the world as one would like to be treated.
• Judaism: What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor. This is the whole Torah; all the rest is commentary

The contemporary Bible translation, The Message, says it this way: Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior. Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them. This catches the spirit of Jesus’ words. “Take the initiative. Do it first.”

Take the initiative to be kind, thoughtful, gracious – before the other person even knows what’s happening.

Wonderful illustration: People I know faced a sudden medical crisis. An ambulance rushed the mom to the hospital. The aunt stayed with the children. Immediately a neighbor appeared at the door. He said he and his wife had no plans that night or the next day and would be glad to help in any way. After the children were asleep, the aunt called them, and Linda came over and spent the night with the children so auntie could join the dad at the hospital.

Linda further arranged for a group of church friends to bring meals every other day for the next two weeks so the family wouldn’t have to worry about cooking.

These two families were of different faiths. Yet Linda and her husband grabbed the initiative and helped ease a difficult time for my friends. Their love was practical and very much appreciated.

What touched me about this story is that Linda and her husband weren't just talking their faith, they were living it. A great example for me to follow!

Story of a guy who seized the initiative while on a business trip.

Finding self worth and purpose

Your purpose is, at heart, a simple one – to be who God knows you to be. To be the active expression of love, kindness, wisdom, intelligence, goodness, and let's remember joy! Be who the infinite Mind of the universe has conceived in the amazing idea package called you.

“I am the place where God shines through
For He and I are one, not two.
He wants me where and as I am –
I need not fret, or fear, or plan.
And if I’ll be relaxed and free
He will express Himself through me.”
author unknown

Here's another view of why you are essential to God and His universe, "I am able to impart truth, health, and happiness, and this is my rock of salvation and my reason for existing."
Mary Baker Eddy, Miscellaneous Writings

Riper years, and what's next?

In the early days of TV, there was a great program called, “Life begins at Eighty!” Each week wonderful men and women in their 80s would share insights into their hobbies, activities, and busy lives. Oddly enough, you didn’t hear these folks discussing diseases or diagnoses. They were too busy living life.

Decay and decline are not laws. Someone wisely observed, “You don’t stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.” The women in my family are incredible. And they do laugh a lot. See laughter blog.

An amazing octogenarian aunt has just begun going to college for the first time in her life. She is loving her teachers, her classes, her classmates. She’s working hard and earning some of the best grades in the class. And her dear husband is cheering her on.

Tired of the low activity level retirement was providing, something in her intuitively rebelled against the world’s “over the hill” attitude. Auntie is living this sentiment by Mary Baker Eddy who thought a lot about what advancing years should bring. Eddy wrote, “Men and women of riper years and larger lessons ought to ripen into health and immortality, instead of lapsing into darkness or gloom.”

And, “Let us then shape our views of existence into loveliness, freshness, and continuity, rather than into age and blight.”

Would you believe, as this column was being written, a friend emailed the following link. It’s a great video example of women of riper years having a ball!

Cats and the Golden Rule

My niece has two indoor cats who enjoy life, and spend a lot of time playing together. Recently an orange tabby walked past their patio. Midnight felt threatened and arched his back, fluffed his tail and screamed at Fluff. Terrified, Fluff arched her back, fluffed her tail, and screamed back. Niece separated them until the tabby strolled out of sight, and harmony returned.

She learned this reaction is called displaced aggression. When a cat’s territory is intruded on, and the cat cannot do anything about it (being indoors) he may attack someone else instead – hence Fluff’s concern. People behave this way too. Dad or Mom has a hard day at work, comes home and is short with his spouse; who scolds their son who lashes out at his younger brother, who kicks the dog, who nips the sleeping cat who hasn’t any idea what’s going on.

All reaction, isn’t it? I’m loving to learn that we don’t have to react. My mom used to advise, “Count to ten,” when something angers you. Cool off and think of a constructive response. Now we both have found the Golden Rule Jesus taught is even better – treat others the way you wish to be treated. The more consistently I manage to do that, the happier my day goes. Even when the unforeseen tabby – the unwelcome character or event – intrudes, that Golden guideline for relationships (as I remember to apply it) keeps me in line. No aggression, no arched backs, no chain reaction. Best of all, it let’s me help others find their peace and self-worth.

Thanks to Lezli Larsen for the peaceful photo!

Planet Earth and the Bible

Following his college teaching career, a high school buddy fulfilled his life-long desire to be a forest ranger. He once told me he was unhappy with Christianity because it preached the destruction of nature.

Over the centuries the domination and destruction of natural environments has sometimes been justified by referring to Genesis 1 where various Bible translations say God gave man dominion/ power/mastery/authority over all the earth and its creatures.

What a joy it was to discover a Bible translation that provides the sense of stewardship and care that I felt had to be the spirit of Genesis 1. Taken from the original languages of the Bible, It reads,
“God created human beings;
He created them godlike,
Reflecting God’s nature.
He created them male and female.
God blessed them:
“Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge!
Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air,
For every living thing that moves on the face of the Earth.”
(from The Message)

What I love about this sense of responsibility is the implied harmony of man with his environment. It encourages respect and careful planning for use of resources. If we think of the creator of the universe as a mighty intelligence, as Mind who relates to His/Her creation intelligently, then that same Mind provides solutions for wisely managing these resources, for restoring and renewing abused lands, for practical steps that contribute to a healthier planet to benefit all mankind. And it is man's nature to look to this Mind for good ideas.

Thanks to Doug Mayhall for this great photo!

Angels - according to kids

On the lighter side, here are kid comments about angels. So enjoy a good smile. And when you get to the bottom, click on Comments and share your own special angel thoughts or angel experiences.

• I only know the names of two angels. Hark and Harold. Gregory, 5
• Everybody's got it all wrong. Angels don't wear halos anymore. I forget why, but scientists are working on it. Olive, 9
• It's not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to heaven, then there's still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes. Matthew, 9
• Angels work for God and watch over kids when God has to go do something else. Mitchell, 7
• My guardian angel helps me with math, but he's not much good for science. Henry, 8
• Angels don't eat, but they drink milk from holy cows. Jack, 6
• Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who's a very good carpenter. Jared , 8
• All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn't go for it. Antonio, 9
• My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth. Katelynn, 9
• Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don't make the animals get better, they help the kid get over it. Vicki, 8

And here is Eddy's perspective, “Angels are God's representatives. These upward-soaring beings never lead towards self, sin, or materiality, but guide to the divine Principle of all good, whither every real individuality, image, or likeness of God, gathers. By giving earnest heed to these spiritual guides they tarry with us, and we entertain ‘angels unawares.’" (Science and Health)

What are angels to you? What are your angel experiences? Click on Comments below.

Purpose and the cornfield

My friend Arthur is a deep thinker and a fellow healer. Recently he wrote: “I was thinking about the similarity between a flower opening and Truth dawning upon consciousness. I farmed for several years and I watched plants from the smallest clovers to the tallest corn stalks grow, really unfold like a flower, as the plant would strive to be ready for the blossoming time. Not only is the plant's growth visible, but on a quiet, warm summer night, a corn stalk's growth can be heard. One has to be there to believe it, but during the first part of the growing season, a cornfield is noisy on a warm, quiet night.” (A wonderful secret that only a farmer would know!)

The response of the corn to sun and rain can almost be seen as a steady reaching up of joy from a grateful plant. I believe God has a holy purpose unfolding in each of us. Something special, beautiful, fulfilling. It’s a bit like Arthur’s corn. As we appreciate the warm sunshine of His presence, and drink in the inspiration of His love, our special purpose begins to grow and mature. Eddy writes "Spirit, God, gathers unformed thoughts into their proper channels, and unfolds these thoughts, even as He opens the petals of a holy purpose in order that the purpose may appear." (Science and Health)

Gratitude for the sunshine and rain, the nurturing and caring from outside ourselves, is itself a prayer. Arthur adds, ”The unfolding of our individual purpose is just as slow and just as sure as the unfolding of the plants in the field and the lambs in the flocks.”

Thank you, Arthur!

Basketball and progress

My 8 year-old grandson plays park district basketball. He's had to learn patience with himself and his teammates as they develop their skills. Yet his tallness gives him some advantage. Recently he had a clear shot at the basket. As he lifted the ball over his head, the one tall kid on the other team came from behind and plucked it out of his hands.

Our boy was stunned, because in all his 6 Saturdays of playing experience, no one had been tall enough to steal the ball in this novel way. An expression of total disbelief registered his surprise before he recovered and trotted down court to defend the other basket.

Have you ever felt on the brink of accomplishing something really good, and suddenly the opportunity was snatched right out of your hands? I sure have! What helps me is to realize that the important thing is not what seems to have happened, but how we deal with it. Blame and resentment are counterproductive. In the give and take of life, as in basketball, there really isn’t time or place for negativity. Progress demands a flexibility that includes forgiveness and moves on, ready for the next rebound. God has designed us to forgive and go forward.

Mary Baker Eddy in her book, Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, wrote in the chapter on Marriage, that “Patience is wisdom.” While patience isn’t a hot item in today’s Western culture, it is part of the mix with progress and forgiveness. Its value for making good decisions and for coming to constructive terms with the unexpected is timeless.