Jun 5, 2008

Listening, not judging



My friend, Kathy, teaches classes for business people to learn to communicate effectively. She has been learning to listen for inspired ideas, to let God as Mind help her prepare for the classes.

In each class there is usually somebody who isn’t happy about having to be there. And she finds it tempting to make a quick judgment about this type of person as a “loud mouth,” a “bully,” or “anti social.”

When this happens, she finds herself spending way too much time fretting about these annoying personalities. Eventually she reminds herself that these classes belong to God. That He/She brings the people who are to be blessed.

The interesting thing is that the difficult people always come around to understand how they can be part of the solution in their companies, instead of being part of the problem.

And my friend has realized that God as Truth hasn’t given her the responsibility of judging His/Her children. She has watched time and again as these men and women begin to take an honest look at how their behavior and language affects others; she has seen softening and a willingness to change replace harshness and anger. She knows she doesn’t cause these changes.

She has come to realize that God as Truth doesn’t burden her with a responsibility to spend her time judging people and then having to worry about them. Her job is to provide an atmosphere that allows people to feel safe among their colleagues. And she has found that she can trust God to reveal the good that is inherently within them.

Assuming responsibilities God hasn’t given us, makes us feel uncomfortable, and then we wonder why. That’s the time to really listen for what the Bible refers to as that “still small voice” of Truth.

I’ve found that God does care, and is very helpful – if we really want to know what to do next and the best way to do it. And – oh yes, this is a big one – if we are willing to completely drop our own preconceptions about how and what we should be doing. Then we are ready to listen.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I just read your blog on "Making a difference." I was intrigued by Eboo Patel's definitions of "success" and "significance" that she sites; the former being about your own achievements, and significance being about what you do for others.

What concerns me these days is that there is so much more focus on being "successful" than there is on being "significant."

Success in contemporary terms seems to be focused on obtaining possessions, money, popularity and fame - often at any cost.

Yet some of the most significant people are not famous or wealthy. I am reminded of a group of men I worked with at one time. When I asked them to think about leaders who had made an impact on their lives, I expected them to list public figures, corporate executives, military heroes or Heisman Trophy winners. I was amazed how many listed their own fathers, mothers; and grandmothers scored at the top of the list! Reason: they had taken the time to be there for the individuals when they needed encouragement and support. And this made a significant - never to be forgotten - impact on their lives.

Thanks Sandi, for the practical and inspiring thoughts you share on this blog.

Julie Gordon