Reality Check

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Message on a local cleaners' sign:

Sorrow looks backward.

Worry looks around.

Faith looks up.

Where are you looking?

Setting goals

Enjoying the moment

A recent MBA graduate went home and, the next day, flipped open her lap top, found the 12-minute Valedictorian speech and called her primary-school sons to her side. “I want you boys to listen to this,” she said. It was a simple and inspired message about giving back, about going out and doing something to make the world a better place.

The boys listened attentively. Then, pointing to the capped-and-gowned young businessman who had delivered those words, she added, “This is you someday.”

Why set such a high goal before kids who are still mastering hitting and catching in a Park District baseball program? Perhaps we should ask, Why not?

Victorian poet Robert Browning wrote,

“Ah, but a man’s reach should exceed his grasp,

or what’s a heaven for?”

If it is true that the purpose for life is to help our fellow man – and teachings which survive the centuries all point in this direction – then there are means to do it.

The need for improving education, jobs, relationships, housing, distributing food and basic necessities, and yes, for preserving the planet says that the opportunities are limitless. The prospects for discovering and implementing ways to advance mankind, for finding the solutions, are also without limit.

So set high goals. If some of us achieve only 10% of these, others will reach 40%, or 60% or even 90%.

And if these objectives are unselfish, attaining even some portion is going to leave the world a better place.

Browning’s American contemporary, religious writer Mary Baker Eddy, had some practical observations about goals, gleaned from a long life of struggle and accomplishment.

“The devotion of thought

to an honest achievement

makes the achievement possible.”

I make strong demands on love,

call for active witnesses to prove it,

and noble sacrifices and grand achievements as its results.”

“What has not unselfed love

achieved for the race?”

Panning for gold

Modern gold rush

Apparently people are panning for gold once again in the American west. Books like the one above are popular. The 49ers of 159 years ago created a brief and wild era as people from all walks of life tried to make their fortunes by panning for gold.

A few became wealthy; most were disappointed and resumed their lives wiser, if poorer, for their efforts.

Most folks regard the past with mixed feelings. Unhappy events make a greater impression than happy times and have a way, if given free rein, of monopolizing memory.

Bad, distressing, or unhappy past events should not be given free rein. For nearly everyone there is also good in the past, and it’s important to identify that good – because good is timeless.

John Greenleaf Whittier wrote, “All of good the past has had remains to make our own time glad. . . God’s love and blessing then and there, are now and here and everywhere.”

It’s a bit like panning for gold. As I understand it, you stand in or next to a shallow river and put a scoop of water, sand, and gravel into your sieve. The water washes away any muck, and in the remaining sediment miners hope to find some bright flecks of gold. It is relatively easy to remove the gold, and toss away the sediment.

So when we have occasion to pan our memories in the river of life, let’s be alert for those small bright flecks of goodness. Gently remove them, place them carefully where they won’t get lost, and throw out the sediment of unhappiness.

This doesn’t mean ignoring evil, or not coming to terms with abuse. It does mean that in spite of difficult times, goodness in some form was present and needs to be identified and celebrated in the present.

I remember reading an emotionally difficult autobiography of a man badly abused by a mentally ill mother. As a little boy he barely escaped her attempts to kill him. Finally a teacher at school recognized the signs of physical abuse and rescued the child – decades before teachers were taught how to look for abuse in their classrooms.

That teacher was a gold nugget in this boy’s tragic childhood.

The youngster overcame the effects of terrible cruelty and, as an adult, helps other children recover from abusive situations.

Every fleck of goodness adds to the substance of good in our lives. They help us live in and appreciate the “now” of God’s love.

Meeting God half way

One loved puppy

"Where the Red Fern Grows," is a great family movie. It's a love story between a boy and his dogs.

Billy Coleman, growing up in the Ozark mountains, at about age 10 wants a pair of redbone hunting dog pups more than anything in the world. Because his family is very poor, he asks God for these puppies.

Eventually he asks his Grampa why after all his prayers, he still has no dogs. His grampa says, “Maybe you need to meet God half way.”

Billy wants to know what this means, and Grampa wisely tells him to think about it.

Think Billy does. Then he puts his prayer into action. He begins doing chores for the neighboring farm families – cutting wood, painting fences, selling vegetables to seasonal hunters. Every nickel, dime, and quarter earned goes into a jar. At the end of two years he has saved enough to buy two fine puppies.

Another way to phrase Billy’s insight is “God helps those who help themselves.” Religious leader Mary Baker Eddy observes that if our prayers are sincere, we will live consistently with the spirit of those prayers.

Was it Ghandi who said, “Become the change you want to see”?

Billy realized he had to be a participant in achieving his prayer.

Christ Jesus taught his followers (throughout all time) to be doers. There’s a balance between prayer and doing. Taking time for prayer undergirds whatever action follows.

So I have to ask myself when I pray, how willing am I to meet God half way? How willing am I to change my thinking from that of an observer to that of a participant? These are two different attitudes.

How willing am I to drop old opinions, old habits, old ways of looking at things in exchange for fresh ideas, fresh approaches? Not change for the sake of change, but change in order to keep up with the times. How willing am I to leave old familiar routines that don’t necessarily promote progress or growth?

How willing am I to do my share to achieve my prayers?

Finding the child heart

Kite flying - pure joy!
This little girl takes advantage
of a windy day at a nearby park.

"Life goes on.” That was the title of a great family TV show two or three decades ago. Life does go on, and times are too adventurous to be left behind.

Smart young people, in my book, are those who, while embracing new ideas, have also learned to value the generations on whose shoulders they are standing.

Smart senior citizens, in my book, are those who increase their circle of friends to keep including young people. Otherwise, how common that sad lament, “All my friends are dying.” Why would anyone limit their circle of friends only to those the world categorizes as “old”?

Because it’s comfortable? Because young people bring new ideas that require some mental wrestling? Because we don’t have to stretch mentally when we stick with friends of our own generation?

Youngest grandson came for two nights this past weekend. He had a whole list of activities for us. I harnessed some of that energy to clean old winter leaves and dirt from the garage floor. What a great worker!

He discovered my Xooter scooter, and nothing would do but for me to ride my bike while he propelled himself on that scooter until he was worn out. We decorated a gingerbread Christmas train – yes in May – until the kitchen was a mess of sticky frosting ambushes.

Amazing Gingerbread Train

Friends come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and ages. It’s OK to push outside our comfort zones and to value those younger, older, and from cultures different from our own. In fact, life requires it.

Everyone has some spark of the divine. As we seek that spark in our “new” friends, as well as our established friendships, life becomes the spiritual adventure it is intended to be. That doesn’t mean danger and excitement, so much as exploring new mental and spiritual horizons together.

“Love never loses sight of loveliness. Its halo rests upon its object. One marvels that a friend can never seem less than beautiful.”

He saw God the other day

I have as a goal finding elements of God's nature in everyone I meet. Some days I do better than others.

Someone sent this YouTube of a talented young musician with the same goal.





See how you connect with Victor Wooten's message.

Mother's Day 2008

As this Mother’s Day draws to a close, I am so grateful for my mom. I so appreciate, more today than yesterday, her unselfed love. Her wisdom, caring, being there to cheer her us kids when we did well, and to reassure us when life seemed tough – these are her expression of God as Mother.

For me this does not diminish God’s fathering role. Rather it complements the masculine protectiveness and decisiveness with a nurturing, tenderness, and steadfast love associated more often with moms.

· A mom is a peacemaker. She wants her children/neighbors/community to get along.
· A mom stands up for what is right. She will side with the teacher when her kids mess up.
· A mom is a good listener. She listens between the lines, between the tears.
· A mom sees through deception when her kids test their boundaries.
· A mom is there for you, even when it means facing consequences.

Even those with no biological children have opportunities to mother – to nurture and support the good in neighbors colleagues, family. The world needs a mother’s wisdom and gentleness, her caring and consolation. If we cannot save the whole world, we can at least mother it.

“Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children.” William Makepeace Thackeray

“The formative period for building character for eternity is in the nursery. The mother is queen of that realm and sways a scepter more potent than that of kings or priests.” Author Unknown

“A mother’s affection cannot be weaned from her child, because the mother-love includes purity and constancy, both of which are immortal. Therefore maternal affection lives on under whatever difficulties.” Mary Baker Eddy

“Father-Mother is the name for Deity, which indicates His tender relationship to His spiritual creation.” Mary Baker Eddy

Joy of music

Third graders on the risers

The grandsons' spring concert was tonight. The tight and efficient format has evolved over decades.

Each grade, K - 5th, sings three short songs.

This year the music teacher jumped light years ahead. Most of the songs were bouncy. Even the kindergartners used hand motions. Each grade addded appropriate dance, rhythm, swing, to their presentations. Everyone went home with singing hearts.

In the words of aTeresa Jennings song from the fifth graders, "Wherever I go in life, whatever I'll be, music will be there for me."

I still remember fun songs I learned in first through fourth grades.

Think about it. Conductors from Japan perform with Chicago and London symphonies - some one hundred musicians playing incredible music with a conductor they have never met before. Conductors from New York make guest appearances in Paris and Sydney - with orchestras they have never conducted before. The notes on the page are a universal language.

Children's choirs travel to various countries. Modern rock and jazz groups play to audiences in countries where they do not speak the native language.

That universal language of music speaks to people's hearts across oceans and generations.

Mary Baker Eddy wrote, "Music is the rhythm of head and heart." I think she's right.

God's love in action

There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit, the same Source, the same Giver. I was listening to these words by Peter Link this morning. He adds insightfully, “These gifts are God’s love in action.”

I thought of the board meeting last night. It’s a good board. I’m happy to be part of it. The members bring many gifts.

The chairman is gracious and orderly, gentle and considerate of others. He bends over backwards to not push his own agenda.

The clerk is gentle and kind, attentive to detail, generous and always willing to help.

The treasurer brings a gentle and willing heart. She is kind and caring.

Karen is a researcher. If something is controversial, she goes onto the Internet, digs into details, background, and shares her findings as well as her own inspiration.

Margie is a peacemaker. If she senses any conflict, she finds the common ground.

Anne loves gardening. It’s her hobby. She brings her common sense about the soil, sun, and rain – what makes healthy growth – to the meetings.

I love the opportunity to see these wonderful qualities, these expressions of God’s love in action, moving the board forward in its purpose to make wise decisions.